i miss the beginning of us. i miss how you were onto me. i miss how you'd actually make an effort to always be with me. i miss you actually showing and giving your love. i miss those times before we got broken. i miss it.

right now it's like .. natural. i don't know .. but i'm still feeling like i'm the one whos giving my all once again. i expect too much. i'm getting attached over again. i expect us to go start over and get back to the beginning. i still feel like you're playing. i'm still hurting. i just hope .. this time you'll stay and think it over .. i honestly don't wanna lose you, i want us to be meant to be. i want us to be together like how we planned. i just hope you'll get over your wrongs and make it better and right this time. i want you to lambing me, i want you to show how much you love me, i wanna know how much you love me. i want clingyness from you so i'll know that you love me and care about me when you're the one whos always gonna be texting and calling me over and over first. for once. i just want it to be you to be in my spot. giving your all. showing your all. i want you to love me, and respect me like you need to.

i told you. i told you i would miss those moments. you see, our moments don't really last anymore. since we're so broken. i really want to fix us. i really want us to go back to the way we were before, giving eachother equal love. even when you're still with me, i'm reminiscing our old moments. our old sweet moments. you've changed. it's not the same anymore.

i miss it back then when you would be the one to check up on me first. text me always. paramdam. i don't know. all that. i miss that. cos it seems like, i'm just the only one whos still doing that til now.

i feel like i want to change. you make me want to stop caring too much about you because its like nothing. when i text, call, its liek you don't bother to check if ive texted or called. i give you my all, i give you what you want, its like you take it for granted. its like you don't appreciate it.

it hurts because i want you to love the same way as i love you.
like, i love you so much, but i can't feel it back from you.
i question, do you ever think of me 24/7 like how i think about you.
the beginning was just the best though. you'd be the one who would text me in the morning like " goodmorning beh ! i love you ! < 3 " well shit, i miss those days.

it's just not the same nomore.